#a whole book on it really
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let it be known that I completed my journal today, like I wrote on the last available page for it
holy shit
#ben rambles about shit#its a green leather one that I bought for summer vacation 2013#it lasted me ten fucking years#what the fuck a whole decade#we forgot to take it with us when we went on vacation in august before 8th grade started#like I wrote in it each time something important enough happened that I'd remembered its existence#we'd had to find it through all the piles of papers and notebooks and sketchbooks on our desk#or when we got the book shelves and couldn't keep it in the same spot for us to find omfg#like this journal was there when I met the most important people of my life#wrote in it when I graduated and went to college#wrote in it sometimes when I had to just write out my thoughts that were keeping me up at night#the process of my handwriting getting to what it is today like similarities can be seen to the chicken scrall I had ten years ago#yet its so damn different to the chicken scrall we have today lmao#the first entry was a sketch of the beach in cali#it was done when I got back from vacationing and realised I forgot it which defeated the purpose of why I got it in the first place#as in to write all the things I did on those days spent away from home#so it became tradition to just forget the journal and a joke to try and finish it at all#the last entry I made today because I finally stopped procrastinating and make the important phone calls#we reached an epiphany of sorts and could finally fill out those last two pages that had been sitting blank since last year#literally closing a chapter of my life#a whole book on it really#idk about getting a new one#like what if it takes another ten years to finish?#also the sketchbooks have served for the same purpose recently when writing letters I can't bring myself to send#plus sketches to go along with whatever brain rot we have going on#hmmmm decisions decisions
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sorry danny, sam will never think you’re cool
#danny phantom#danny fenton#sam manson#theres some ocs#college au#sam’s goth book club#i feel like she’d make a lot of good friends at a college#the trio has a highly rehearsed excuse for danny being weird#nobody has any idea what ecto-contamination is bc it doesn’t exist#ghosts are common-ish knowledge by now and amity is the known epicenter#stranger: holy shit your hand just went through that wall#danny: yeah it’s a medical condition :(#fentonworks is in on it too#for credibility#too bad the goths wanted vampires#moving to a new city did wonders for dannys popularity though#he’s got a lot he’s hiding so he can’t really take advantage#he probably knows more people number wise#but has less friends than sam#Tucker has a thriving social media life#but doesn’t get out much#hence that technus comic#can’t believe I finished this#lit took a whole ass week#hahahaha
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Sometimes love is finally getting the courage to give flowers to the girl you like, because you found them growing in the meadows and they reminded you of her, wild and beautiful and free
Sometimes love is choosing to smell oniony for the day rather than telling the boy you like that you recognise the flowers he's picked for you
#the whole flower scene goes down a lot better in this au#her mother has a more supportive community to fall back on when her husband dies#and while she's obviously affected by the loss she's not blue screen catatonic like the books#so katniss isn't AS terrified of love as a result#side note: onion flowers really are very pretty i get why he picked them#though they are SMELLY AF#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#gale hawthorne#everlark#the hunger games#rdr2#these unending skies#fanart#mcbaart
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in another universe they could have been playing at the beach
#gf#gravity falls#tbob#the book of bill#billford#tbob spoilers#stanford pines#bill cipher#ford pines#book of bill#gravity falls fanart#the book of bill spoilers#tbob fanart#book of bill fanart#gf spoilers#baby bill cipher#what a concept#its fun to pair a bill not yet old enough to understand his capacity to commit horrors#with a ford old enough to know better who still hasn't fully grasped this whole empathy thing#something of a dynamic switch but not really#otherwise it would be very 80s movie core...ford finds a strange alien companion who “takes care of” his bullies
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Sometimes I think about the FNAF 3 ending,,
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf 3#dave afton#evan afton#fnaf cassidy#michael afton#golden freddy#the song in the good ending of FNAF 3 is ‘don’t go’#and that alone made me wanna draw this out#Michael in the final moments of his little brother remembering who he is#having his birthday finally#he clings to him wanting to let him know he’s sorry#as he passes on#It’s very clear through the survival logbook#that Cassidy and Michael were trying to help Dave remember who he is#I think the book really paints a touching extra bit of information to that whole game#sorry for this weekly angst yall 🙏🏾
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Sunrise on the Reaping changes the whole game. Suddenly, Katniss isn't the chosen one anymore, or the only person who can make the capital pay for what they have done. She's just a girl with a long list of grievances, coming from a long line of people with even longer lists who have been trying to make them pay for years.
She finds her victory standing on the backs of hundreds or thousands of people who came before her. All pushing for the same goal, all guided by the same anger and grief and the need to go out on their own terms. The same things that caused Katniss to reach for the poisoned berries for her and Peeta in the first place.
When Katniss gives her "fire is catching" it echos the same purpose the districts have had for centuries; honour the dead, make the capitol take responsibility: Sejanus with the breadcrumbs, Reaper; who covered his dead with the capitol flag, Haymitch running with Louella to make Snow face what he'd done, Haymitch running again with Lou Lou, Katniss covering Rue in flowers, Peeta painting a mural of her for the gamemakers, so when the last stand finally comes she has all of her living allies behind her, but not only that. It's like Haymitch said: "Those 31 allies I boasted of to the head game maker? I can feel every one of them at my back"
She has every person who suffered at the hands of the capital, every person who was abused, every person who was reaped too soon, every person who died, standing at her back and in the end I think that's what gave her the strength to finish the fight.
#katniss is such a strong character and she didn't deserve anything she got#sotr really adds depth in the fact that katniss really was just a girl way out of her depth#that got thrown into a plan she didn't even know about to be the hero of panem#she was really too young for this#everyone was#I know I’ve said this whole thing before but this book really yells it#haymitch abernathy#peeta mellark#reaper ash#sunrise on the reaping#thg sotr#the hunger games#thg series#katniss everdeen
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I think, perhaps one of the funniest things to come from EPIC popularising the Odyssey is that now a ton of people think Poseidon wanted to kill Odysseus.
In the Odyssey, Poseidon has no intention of killing Odysseus. In fact, part of the whole reason Zeus lets Poseidon do whatever he wants even though he thinks Odysseus is rad and should get to kiss his wife is explicitly because Poseidon had no intentions of killing Odysseus. Poseidon wanted to pay back the suffering/inconvenience blinding Polyphemus would have caused. It's a really abstract thing tbh. How do you pay back someone permanently disabling your son? Poseidon's solution was just to amputate Odysseus from his other half; i.e. Penelope. The end game was never murder, it was always an endurance race.

(Od. Book 1: Zeus reassuring Athena that he is not, in fact, a part of Odysseus Hater-Nation. Trans. Robert Fagles)
Also, for those wondering if there's any sort of in text reason for why Poseidon wasn't around in God Games - at the time in the Odyssey when Athena petitions Zeus to let Odysseus leave Calypso's island, Poseidon was -checks notes- on vacation in Ethiopia. Yep. He left to Ethiopia for a festival and thusly was very much absent for Athena's whole "please let Ody go? Please? 🥺" request.

(Od. Book 1: While Odysseus was suffering, Poseidon went to party in the east)
I am begging y'all to read the Odyssey. It's a comedy for everyone except Odysseus and Penelope who are, in fact, suffering 24/7 365.
#ginger rambles#ginger chats about greek myths#Sorry for the quality of the quotes but I'm too tired to google a pdf vers of the Odyssey and then edit those so y'all are getting#my crunchy pictures from one of my physical copies of the book lol#it's reiterated multiple times that Poseidon doesn't want Odysseus dead too#he is literally just driving him mad on the ocean because that's what Odysseus condemned Polyphemus to by blinding him#Also there's no good way to mention this but the Odyssey starts#by Zeus lamenting how mortals blame all their troubles and miseries on the gods when that's just not fair#because the gods go out of their way to warn the mortals that will be saddled with the most wretched fates#and they ignore the gods and do whatever they want anyway LMFAO#It's a really smart way to tie in the whole Orestes plot that would have wrapped up in between Odysseus getting stranded on Ogygia#and Odysseus getting off of Ogygia#epic the musical#epic the wisdom saga#zeus#athena#odysseus#poseidon#the odyssey
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one of the standout things from tsc and tgr that I’m still thinking about is just everyone highlighting just how Unsettling Neil Josten actually is… Jeremy being unnerved by Neil’s smile, Jean noting the ice in Neil’s stare… incredible, amazing, give me more
#Neil Josten#the man you are#character of all time perhaps#the foxhole court#tfc#aftg#all for the game#the golden raven#the sunshine court#jean moreau#jeremy knox#I really just feel like I could vibrate at a rate so high I would combust when I think about him#3rd book is gonna give me just peak unhinged Neil commentary from the Trojans and I simply cannot wait#like surely one of the Trojans will make a comment about how maybe Neil is the crazy one and not Andrew on their team#and jeans gonna be like#yeah#how has it taken everyone this long to see this I’ve been telling you the whole time
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Was pondering how Mark’s rigid ass mask/lens is prob a Budget Thing (since squishy, bendy lens are pretty much a mandate for all hero animated series, like JL, BTAS, TNBA, Spider-Man, etc), and then I was slapped with a vision of Mark in a more JL/BTAS-ish style and I had to see it through. I am a genius btw.
#i had MANY thoughts while drawing my brain melted while posting so if ya have questions send 'em / ask 'em#but rapid fire: leans more into nightwing's look b/c bro's name is legit grayson + moves away from his father's sidekick/protege +#and legit has a blue and black outfit. that is soooo winking at robin (dick grayson specifically)#mark has a more casual / athletic fit and tried to keep his usual kicked puppy expression / mood#which then contrasts his more emotional (hero) side he acts upon when he's suited up as ANOTHER wink to the whole dual persona#mark does it unintentionally as he's eager to prove himself as invincible and thus more emotional/confidential/eager + feels lackluster#as just mark grayson.#but it's such a comic book trope it's interesting el show ignores the potential stakes for that + prob cause they dont focus on#villains#mark has debbie's cheek bones + pearls both so he skip the whole copy paste design tactic cartoons annoyingly use + wink at batman w/ pearl#nolan wears pink and debbie wears green b/c they have conflicting views on raising Mark but (used to?) stand on a somewhat#united front by having same collared shirt. but mark leans more on debbie's stuff visually w/ cooler colors + white shirt underneath#mark keeps his cape as another wink/nod at robins (tim drake TNBS specifically) which mimics his Dad + kid-like eagerness for hero stuff#which he gets rid off when he goes blue/black suit arc (cough cough nightwing looking ass) so just leaned MORE into it#mark has a heart on his chest because he's TRYING to do what he think he's best + emotional asf#lens/goggles are diff to keep the audiences' eye back at HIS eyes + look more ominous and predatory which the black/blue combo#already COULD do in canon but in show its just pallete swapped which ruins the more ominious look it probably intended#and doesnt really scream “OH NO! THERE'S NO GOLD! WHICH could be a marker of mark's joy vanishing!!!”#but i hope it does now but ALSO having design changes#the brainrotsreal's art tag ✧˖°:*♡#invincible rotating in my mind#mark grayson#invincible fanart#invincible#fanart#digital art#procreate art#i wish the style leaned more this way since it is messing with or TRYING to mess with some superhero tropes before it does its own thing#just straight up use nostalgia bait while it has his JL knock off#artists on tumblr
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Some messy Jhesses from this week
#doctorsiren#gravity falls#the book of bill#jheselbraum the unswerving#bill cipher#stanford pines#mabel pines#billford#gravity falls fanart#digital art#my art#procreate#Mabel’s like ‘lmaoooo were they really a thing HAHAHA’#everyone just bullies Ford for it 😭#the amount of axolotls I’ve drawn this week as a whole is unreasonable#(most of that is bc I’m working on an illustration project and mine has an axolotl in it HIUSHUIHD)
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My artbook just arrived and what do you mean they could have looked like this?? Who looked at these designs and thought: No wait, I have a better idea :)
WHO WAS IT?? COME HERE I JUST WANNA TALK
#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age#morrigan#dorian pavus#isabela dragon age#idk is this a spoiler?#i guess#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#datv spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dav spoilers#i'm so mad not gonna lie#so you're really telling me there were these designs and they CHANGED them??#WHY???#i'm sorry i don't want to be mad but this is honestly so frustrating#the whole art book makes me a little angry ngl#veilguard critical#ugh#my girl morrigan actually looks like i think she would 20 years down the line ;A;#ahhh
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<<FIRST<< >NEXT>
btw this comic takes place a while after the second movie for that crew and maybe a month or two after the 12th book. There will be a few spoilers for the books just fyi it’s my personal head canon that even after his memories return, hiccup still struggles a bit with things like keeping his languages straight. If he’s speaking dragonese for a while he can get stuck and needs help from the wodensfang to speak Norse again.
#Part 2 is done guys#I’m NOWHERE near done with all of it#I have no idea how long this whole thing will take me#I really hope I don’t get burned out too fast#art#artwork#illustration#digital art#fanart#httyd books#httyd fanart#how to train your dragon books#book hiccup#Httyd book/movie crossover au#httyd book toothless#httyd movies#comic art#fan comic
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Jeremy is so brave bc if I saw Jean doing up his gloves with his teeth it would’ve been over for me
#And then he just had to go about his day#I have so many drawing ideas brain full many thoughts#Also this book really makes u realise how asexual Neil is#Like Jeremy and jean are always having weird gay thoughts about each other#And Neil is just like wowwwwwwww look at andrews eyes#And that’s after three whole books#Meanwhile Jeremy looked at jean in a blue shirt and had to leave the room#tsc spoilers#tsc fanart#The sunshine court#aftg#jean moreau#doodle#my art
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I loved your drawing(and I love your style in general) with Leia in your recent post! If/when you have time can we see more of her in your style? I get so happy whenever I actually see people mention/talk about her and she’s not just forgotten because we didn’t get to see much of her. 😭
thank you! 💙💙💙 Leia/Leah/Lea/whatever is fascinating to me. she is the ultimate unknown. what was she like? how involved (or even aware of any details of the invasion) was she? Silver's basically a physical carbon copy of his biodad, so what did he get from her? like, I understand why the two of them kind of have to stay as these super vague and mysterious figures -- the whole point of them is that their story ended 400+ years ago and they're not really relevant anymore (and. well. the more that gets explained about them, the less that can just kinda be handwaved as "oh the politics were Very Messy") (we can sit here and theorize all day but let us acknowledge that, ultimately, canon gave us almost nothing about them post-Meleanor and we'd just be making things up). I do still wonder about her though! RIP Lea, we never knew you and we probably never will.
actually you know what, as long as we're here, I think I WILL go ahead and just make some stuff up about what Silver might've inherited from her instead.
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 13 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 13 spoilers#there may be answers somewhere that i just forgot about so uhhh if so#whoops ( ᐛ )#having one of those art days where chances are good i'm just gonna wake up and throw this post out the window so be warned#but yeah idk. i've talked before about the parallels between silver and dawnatello and how i see him as basically bad end silver#he chose the easy option that let him stay loyal and fulfill the obligation he felt to his adoptive family#he knew it wasn't right and that he was being manipulated but he went along with it anyway until it was too late#i think he ultimately had a good heart but my man folded under the slightest bit of social pressure like a wet mcmuffin#so while i'm continuing to make things up out of whole cloth i wanna say that by contrast#lea never had a chance to do shit but if she had i like to think she would've had a spine like galvanized steel#like just personally i don't think she knew much about what the silver owls were actually doing#seriously does henrik seem like the kind of person who would tell her shit about anything#i think he basically took advantage of their dad's failing health to go off and be a warmonger#and if he thought about lea at all it was to be like :) you stay here and do boring domestic princess stuff#while i tell your husband to Do It For Her#i mean this is 100% me writing baseless fanfic here#i just think it'd be fun if the part of silver that was IMMEDIATELY like 'actually no. we aren't doing this.' might've come from her#she just never got a chance to show it#(it didn't seem to come from the knight is all i'm saying)#lilia might've given silver a billion complexes but at least he raised him to do the right thing#man someone left a reply or reblog on an older post and i cannot find it so i apologize for the lack of credit BUT they pointed out#that one of the big differences between silver and the knight is that the knight's family did not really seem to like him very much and lik#yeah i think so. lea might've been the exception there for him.#rip ma'am we'll never know if you deserved better or not
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I love Brackenpaw in the graphic novel so much oh my god. He’s so polite and he only speaks in normal (by normal, I mean not-all-caps lettering you���d see in day to day) lettering. It’s probably to contrast him with how excitable and loud Cinderpaw is, but since Every Single Other Character always talks in all caps it just makes him seem like such a polite quiet little guy.. I adore him so much
#maybe this is really obvious but I adore this detail it really stands out when you look at the whole book overall#nobody else talks like that unless they’re whispering#I tell you this makes me like him more and I mean that#warrior cats graphic novel#warrior cats graphic novel spoilers#graphic novel spoilers#are we tagging these as spoilers idk I’ll do it jic#warrior cats#warriors#the prophecies begin#brackenfur#cinderpelt#fireheart#graystripe
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When I was very small and I didn't feel good, my mom used to make up stories to tell me. Books were nice but didn't tell me the things I wanted to know about most. I didn't get to explore them unless it was in my own imagination. And that's fun, but being told stories is better in a lot of ways. So I would ask her to tell me stories about Peter Rabbit or Robin Hood, or any other character I really loved. I would tell her what I wanted the story to be about, and she would make it up, and I could stop her anytime and ask her for more details, or to change something. I'm sure this was occasionally frustrating for her, but it's something I really enjoyed. I think it was probably part of what made me want to become a writer.
I don't feel good tonight. I'm too drained to read. Audiobooks aren't the same as somebody sitting with me and telling me a story.
I don't wish for my mom to be around very often, and I'm not really wishing for that now. But I do wish I had somebody to sit with me and be kind and make up stories for me until I feel well enough to get up and do it for myself.
#anyway yeah if you have kids story time is one of the most important things you can do with them#you don't have to make up stories out of whole cloth like my mother did#I know that's a lot of work#but reading books or telling stories or talking about your past or your family's story#all that kind of thing#it sticks with your kids in a way that really matters#I was maybe 5 years old?#even if I'd lost my mom really young I would still remember all that story time#rambling again#screaming endlessly into the void
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